Lots of us feel heart-broken after a break up and this can often have a very odd effect on us women and make us act out of the ordinary. However, in our vulnerable state we think that acting this way will result in him changing his mind and having the fairy-tale ending that you always dreamed of. In reality all you are doing is confirming that he made the right choice to end things…
- Don’t keep contacting him
Stop messaging him all the time. He doesn’t want you grovelling at the end of the phone. He has made his decision and you should respect that. Why would you want to be with someone who doesn’t want you? All you are going to do is annoy him to the point that he will stop replying or even ‘block’ you.
- Don’t stalk his social media
You won’t like what you find. If you’ve just broken up I doubt you are going to see that he changed his profile photo to a lovely one of you both from your last summer holiday, or that he’s tagged you in a ‘couple goals meme’. Chances are he’s changed his relationship status to single which isn’t going to make you feel good when you see this or he hasn’t been on social media at all, in which you are wasting your time looking. If you do find anything you ‘will’ read into it. His best ‘girl mate’ tags him in something and suddenly you make up this whole story in your head of how they have been sleeping together behind your back. Save yourself the trouble and ‘stop stalking him’ and every girl that he speaks to!
- Don’t post about it on your social media
No one wants to see how depressed you are after a break up. The friends that you need around you will already be there. All you are doing is ruining a potential future relationship; other guys will see this and will be put off instead of taking an interest that you’re newly single. Obviously at this point you ‘don’t want anyone else’ but months down the line you’ll regret all the depressing social media posts. Instead, post all the exciting adventurous things that are happening in your life, don’t make it obvious but show him what he’s missing. If he still doesn’t come back then clearly he isn’t ‘the one’.
- Don’t speak to his friends
They don’t want you grovelling either. He will just get annoyed when he hears you have done this. And yes… they will tell him. Remember the ‘Bro Code’!
- Don’t turn up to places you know he is
If he wanted to see you he would make this happen. By turning up to places that he is, whether that be the pub, a club, or a mutual friends BBQ, you will just make it awkward for you, him, and all others that know you both. Maybe in the future when things have settled, it may be OK that you bump into each other every now and then, but right now avoid these situations! Seeing him will only upset you more and then when you leave all you’ll want to do is message him, then the whole cycle starts all over again.
So there you go. Deep down we all know this is true, but still most of us act in this way. If you have the will power, save yourself the hurt. Look at the positives; you’re no longer wasting your time on him and can now move forward with your life. If you’re meant to be together you will find your way eventually. But for now enjoy being single.
‘Don’t be the psycho ex, be the one who got away…’
Anything for boys?? 😞🙇
The male perspective has now been posted by Guest writer Jonathan Barakat. Enjoy! Interesting how similar this is to the female, Maybe male and female are more alike than we think.
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